Was Your Mom a Daddyless Daughter?  How is that Effecting You Today?

Was Your Mom a Daddyless Daughter? How is that Effecting You Today?

Who was there FOR you as an infant?

Who held you when you were scared or crying? 

As I was reading in my book Homecoming:  Reclaiming and Championing Your Inner Child this morning by John Bradshaw, that sentence jumped off the screen at me!  Who was there FOR you as an infant?Who held you when you were scared or crying?  I thought back and didn’t remember anyone being there to hold me when I was scared or crying.  I did remember, however, when I was upset and crying as a very little girl my mom would tell me sternly that I was only crying to get attention and to stop.  I didn’t know the words back then but it felt very shaming.  Like there was something wrong with me for even being upset so to survive I learned to shut down.  As I got older that shut down feeling became making a joke to protect myself. Can you relate?

cry25n-3-webI kept reading….

“The more ashamed a child is, the more she feels she has no right to DEPEND on anyone.  Because the wounded child never got her needs met and was shamed the most when she was the most needy, she may feel that she is bothering people if she asked them to listen to her.

Whew, BINGO!  That was it exactly!  That’s how I felt.  Can you relate?

I started thinking about my Happy Mother’s Day post to my Mom the other day and wondering if my Mom ever had anyone there for her when she was scared or crying as a little girl.  I know my grandma, her mom, even though she passed before I was born, sounded like she was a pretty tough lady, kind of hard as nails!  Not very warm and fuzzy at all!!

Then I remembered that I had recently realized that my Mom had been, as Iyanla Vanzant on the OWN channel, calls a “daddyless daughter.”   Her dad was an alcoholic and her mom left and lived as a single mom raising 7 kids by herself in the 1920’s and 1930’s.  Oh my goodness!  I’m not sure how old my mom was when they split up but I can only imagine how tough it must have been for her.  It was very tough in the 1980’s when I was a single mom with only two kids!!  I don’t even know if my mom ever saw her dad as she was growing up or not.  I knew all of this at some level but I never stopped to think about how that may have affected and impacted her ability to be a mother to me until now.

I went to a youtube video by Iyanla and watched her talking about daddyless daughters.  She described that when a woman doesn’t have a daddy, either when they are there but not emotionally there, they are gone entirely or they were there but left because of divorce etc it creates a hole and a yearning that nothing ever seems to fill.  They feel UNwanted, UNloved, UNloveable, UNacceptable, UNimportant, UNattractive and UNworthy.  It’s all starting to make so much more sense now… that this is the women that I was so desperate to depend on and get my needs met from.  I can imagine that when she felt me being needy it triggered her own neediness and it must have been so very painful for her.  No wonder she treated me the way she did.  No wonder “I” felt like there was no one there for “me” when I was scared or crying because she felt like there was no one there for “her.”

I so appreciate the past 7 years of using EFT for myself (often with the help of others) so I can put together these puzzle pieces of my life now.  Before EFT I was so caught in the painful feelings and the wounds of that little child inside of me that I couldn’t see or feel anything else.  It was all about me.  There was no way I could have ever felt safe enough to see it in a way that I no longer felt like a victim and to be able to see it from my mom’s perspective.

I’d love for you to share what popped up for you while reading my story below.

We so often think that we are so screwed up and everyone else has their shit together but I’m here to tell you that we are all in this together.  We have much more in common when we talk about our wounded inner child than we can imagine.

Until next time… hugs!

Gwen

 

 

 

Happy Mothers Day Mom.

Happy Mothers Day Mom.

Happy Mothers Day Mom. I decided to write a list of the things i appreciate about you today. (This feels very odd and foreign b/c I’ve spent a lifetime focusing on what you did wrong and how badly you hurt and upset me). Its time to take a look at the other side of the coin…

yellow roses–I appreciate that you thought it was so important to come to be with me at school during the movie “Its Wonderful Being a Woman.”

–I appreciate that you came with my class when i took my first train ride.

–I appreciate that you were clean and taught me to keep my body clean (even tho I’ve rebelled a bit from your OCD ways in other parts of my life. 😊)

–I appreciate that you often smelled of Jergen’s lotion when i was little.

–I appreciate that you learned to drive when you were 53 years old.

–I appreciate that you and Daddy stayed married for 37 years until Daddy passed when i was 17 and i didn’t have to have divorced parents.

–I appreciate that you “wore the pants” in the family way back then and gave me a role model as a strong woman.

–I appreciate you having me when you were 42 when my siblings were 18, 17 & 14.

–I appreciate your stories of psychics, psychic phenomena and reincarnation.

–I appreciate you (and Daddy) teaching me how to recycle and compost waay before it was popular.

–I appreciate you working at the hospital cafeteria when i was little and buying me things like my new bed and making me a matching bedspread and curtains with your money.

–Thank you for sewing me Barbie doll clothes.

–Thank you for showing me how important it is to vote by dressing up to do it.

–Thank you for working so hard to make delish homemade chicken and noodles for special dinners.

–Thank you for making homemade raspberry jam, applesauce, apple butter, apple pies and canned green beans from our fruit trees and garden.

–Thank you for liking the color yellow.

What a funny experience, the more I write the more warm memories about my mom are coming out of the woodwork… 😊 Thank you EFT for helping me to be able to naturally go there.  Healing our inner childhood wounds is priceless!! 

I 💛 you Mom, Happy Mothers Day!

AH-HA…. JUST START!!

just StartAfter posting this to my Facebook page this morning, feeling oddly calm and serene, because I know how many years I’ve worked to get to this point in my relationship with my mom, I turned to page 113 in my book Homecoming: Reclaiming and Championing Your Inner Child by John Bradshaw and started to read…. As I eagerly absorbed page by page information about the wounded inner child… 

  • The more I read, the more validated I felt.

  • The more I read, the more I KNEW in my heart that this is what I am meant to do and how many ways my wounded inner child has stopped me

  • The more I read, the more I realized just how much I LOVE being an Inner Child Advocate and using EFT Tapping to help myself and others heal their own wounded inner child so they stop controlling our adult lives.

Then I started thinking about a conversation I’d had with my adult daughters last weekend about how I see the world and what I naturally think of when someone is struggling with something in their lives... they both said “oh, I don’t even think about that!”  

AH-HA, it hit me like a ton of bricks!! 

Perhaps sharing the steps I’ve taken (an am still taking b/c I’m a work in progress) to help heal my own wounded inner child could be beneficial for others

Perhaps others simply can’t see what I see because they don’t think about things the same way as I do.

Perhaps sharing with others what I experience and observe, from my perspective, might be beneficial in helping them understand what’s happening in their own lives and how  they could potentially benefit from using EFT Tapping.

Then the words, “JUST START” from transformational comedian Kyle Cease instantly came to me!

JUST START…

What if I simply do what I do every morning… read, journal, & tap as my own Inner Child Advocate… and share my journey with you?  Sort of like a Tapping Reality show.  LOL!  OK, please consider this my START!

If you are interested in continuing to read my posts please do nothing and they will automatically start coming to you as an email.  If this does not sound like your cup of tea, and it’s not a good fit, that’s fine, you can easily UPDATE your information or UNSUBSCRIBE by scrolling to the bottom of the page.

I’d love to hear your feed back along the way.  Please make comments and ask questions below.  Let’s have a conversation!

Warmly,

Gwen

UNLOCK Your Invisible Money Blocks

UNLOCK Your Invisible Money Blocks

UNLOCK Your Invisible Money Blocks…

Money Heart

Teleseminar THURSDAY April 14, 2016
10:30am Pacific / 1:30pm Eastern

ONLY $25

Are you a Women who is Passionate about Making a Difference doing what you love, yet you are earning less than your potential?   

Do you sabotage yourself and seem to experience the same ol unhealthy patterns around money over and over again?

Do you experience a lot of fear when it comes to money? 

(Fear of failing, fear of rejection, afraid of being judged, afraid of people not liking you because you have or don’t have it, afraid of being really successful, fear of the responsibility of having a lot of money or the fear of losing it all?)

If you answered YES to any of the questions above you may be living with some invisible limiting beliefs around money that are preventing you from living Your Strongest Life.  

Are you ready to get to the heart of the matter and UNLOCK those Money Blocks once and for all?

Join Stella Kopperud and I for an interactive, one hour teleseminar, on Thursday April 14, 2016 at 10:30am Pacific / 1:30pm Eastern to:

  • learn the basics of  *EFT tapping
  • be chosen as a volunteer to tap on & reduce or clear one of your own money blocks
  • experience Borrowing Benefits -simply tapping along with someone else on their issues, can help you reduce the intensity of your own.

REGISTER NOW Simply send you name, email address, phone number and

I’m excited to help you to UNLOCK Your Invisible Money Blocks!

Hugs!
Gwen

PS:

*EFT = Emotional Freedom Technique, a combination of ancient Chinese medicine and modern psychology, like emotional acupuncture without needles.

GOT STRESS?  The Stress Test Study That Shocked  the Researchers…

GOT STRESS? The Stress Test Study That Shocked the Researchers…

8th Annual Tapping World Summit

starts Feb 22nd

Join 20 of the World’s leading EFT Tapping Experts in this FREE Online Event as They Show you Step by Step How to Improve Your Finances, Health, Emotions and Much More…

This event is 100% content only and 100% free to attend during the 10 days

Click here to learn more:  http://www.tappingworldsummit.com/

 ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

The Stress Test Study That Shocked the Researchers…

“75 to 90% of all doctor visits are for stress-related ailments and complaints.”

~WebMD

*|FNAME|*  GOT STRESS?  As the quote above states anxiety and stress are one of the biggest underlying causes of doctor visits and health issues.  The following study was performed by Dr. Dawson Church, PhD and Dr. David Feinstein, PhD, and measured the stress hormone cortisol levels before and after treatment.  They were shocked at the results.  I have personally used EFT Tapping for myself and hundreds of clients over the past 7 years and I can attest to it’s emotional effectiveness!  Now here are the numbers…

“83 participants were divided into 3 groups: the 1st group received an hour of  EFT Tapping; the 2nd group received an hour of psychotherapy (“talk” therapy); the 3rd group (control group) received no treatment.

The researchers measured cortisol levels before and after the treatment. Cortisol was measured because it is known as the “stress hormone” of the body. As stress goes up, cortisol levels go up.

When the researchers were measuring the cortisol levels of the Tapping group after treatment they thought they had a problem…

The levels had dropped so significantly in such a short period of time that they thought there must be something wrong with their equipment.

They kept re-calibrating their equipment and retesting until they finally came to the conclusion that there was in fact…nothing wrong with their equipment but rather that…the Tapping worked!

Results: The 1st group (Tapping) demonstrated a 24% decrease in cortisol levels; the 2nd and 3rd groups showed no change in cortisol levels.

The reality: Psychotherapy alone relieves stress, but over a long period of time. The immediate benefits of psychotherapy don’t register in your body, where excessive amounts of the “stress hormone” cortisol still run rampant, putting your health at risk.

Study findings:  Tapping balances activity between the sympathetic and parasympathetic regions of your brain, producing “a neutral emotional state,” the gold standard of health and wellness.”
~ The Tapping Solution

Stress is expensive….
Emotional Freedom is priceless!

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Weekly Teleseminars:
Tapping into Your Strongest Life


Thursdays at 10:30am Pacific (1:30pm Eastern)

ONLY $20 each

Are you a women coach, holistic practitioner or someone who has a passion to make a difference in the world but you feel STUCK?

Clear the anxiety, stress, fears, phobia’s, trauma’s, self-doubt and self-sabotaging behavior that is keeping you STUCK from getting to the next level in your business or your life.

Join us for a weekly Emotional Freedom teleseminar tapping circle done via the phone from the privacy of your own home or office.

  • Learn how to do basic EFT tapping.
  • Get relief as a volunteer on your own specific obstacles
  • Get borrowing benefits from tapping along with the volunteers.
  • The sessions will be recorded and available to listen to for 7 days afterward on the website.

I invite you to join us and tell your friends…   Click HERE to sign up NOW!  I look forward to helping you on your emotional freedom journey!

Hugs!   Gwen

PS   Remember, 1 hour of EFT = 100 hours of counseling/ talk therapy.  Please don’t keep me, and what I do, a secret and help me help your friends, family & colleagues get out of their own way so they can make THE difference they are here to make.

GOT STRESS?  The Stress Test Study That Shocked the Researchers…

GOT STRESS? The Stress Test Study That Shocked the Researchers…

8th Annual Tapping World Summit
starts Feb 22nd


Join 20 of the World’s leading EFT Tapping Experts in this FREE Online Event as They Show you Step by Step How to Improve Your Finances, Health, Emotions and Much More…

This event is 100% content only and 100% free to attend during the 10 days.

 ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

The Stress Test Study That Shocked the Researchers…

“75 to 90% of all doctor visits are for stress-related ailments and complaints.”

~WebMD

 

GOT STRESS?  As the quote above states anxiety and stress are the biggest underlying causes of doctor visits and health issues today.  Stress permeates so many areas of our lives, our health, our emotions, our relationships, our jobs, our finances and sabotages our overall quality of life.  What if it didn’t have to be that way?

The following study was performed by Dr. Dawson Church, PhD and Dr. David Feinstein, PhD, and measured the stress hormone cortisol levels before and after treatment.  They were shocked at the results.  I have personally used EFT Tapping for myself and hundreds of clients over the past 7 years and I can attest to it’s emotional effectiveness!  Now here are the numbers…

“83 participants were divided into 3 groups: the 1st group received an hour of  EFT Tapping; the 2nd group received an hour of psychotherapy (“talk” therapy); the 3rd group (control group) received no treatment.

The researchers measured cortisol levels before and after the treatment. Cortisol was measured because it is known as the “stress hormone” of the body. As stress goes up, cortisol levels go up.

When the researchers were measuring the cortisol levels of the Tapping group after treatment they thought they had a problem…

The levels had dropped so significantly in such a short period of time that they thought there must be something wrong with their equipment.

They kept re-calibrating their equipment and retesting until they finally came to the conclusion that there was in fact…nothing wrong with their equipment but rather that…the Tapping worked!

Results: The 1st group (Tapping) demonstrated a 24% decrease in cortisol levels; the 2nd and 3rd groups showed no change in cortisol levels.

The reality: Psychotherapy alone relieves stress, but over a long period of time. The immediate benefits of psychotherapy don’t register in your body, where excessive amounts of the “stress hormone” cortisol still run rampant, putting your health at risk.

Study findings:  Tapping balances activity between the sympathetic and parasympathetic regions of your brain, producing “a neutral emotional state,” the gold standard of health and wellness.”
~ The Tapping Solution

Stress is expensive….
Emotional Freedom is priceless!

 ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~


Interested in learning more about EFT Tapping?
  I invite  you to join us on the emotional freedom journey….   sign up to receive our  Your Strongest Life Emotional Freedom coaching newsletter TODAY. www.yourstrongestlife.com

1 hour of EFT = 100 hours of talk therapy/ counseling. 

Sound too good to be true?  Check it out for yourself.  What have you got to lose except a lot of stress?

I look forward to helping you on your emotional freedom journey!

Hugs!   Gwen

 

 

 

Understanding the Wounded Child Archtype – Can you relate?  I sure can!

Understanding the Wounded Child Archtype – Can you relate? I sure can!

As some of you know, I’ve been working on narrowing my niche for sometime.  I’m feeling wonderful about the work I do as an Inner Child Advocate.  Ever since I read about the Wounded Child archtype in Carolyn Myss’s book Sacred Contracts I felt completely drawn to it.  I AM a wounded child so that’s why I relate to it so strongly.  This is the work I’ve been doing but I had no idea on how to marketed it properly.  (most likely because my wounded inner child has been running my business for the past 6 years.  So afraid of making a mistake and getting in trouble.  So hard to deal with my shame of not feeling good enough…………

The more I’ve used tapping to nurture and take care of my wounded inner child the more enlightened and helpful I feel I can be.  Don’t’ get me wrong, I’m human and still a work in progress but it’s made a world of difference!

 

I’m so excited that I recently came across a beautiful description of the Wounded Child archtype written by Susanna Barlow.  I’ve edited her essay below a bit for clearer understanding for you but you can read it in it’s entirety by clicking HERE.

 

The Wounded Child archetype has experienced some kind of initiatory wound in their early life. This experience creates a lens through which the Wounded Child views their circumstances and the motives or actions of others. This usually happens at a fairly young age when the child is highly impressionable. his experience or string of experiences acts as an initiation inextricably linking the Wounded Child to the path they were meant to live. I call this the lens of pain.

This lens (created by the initial wound) through which all things are now experienced colors, defines and shapes the way the Wounded Child perceives their life.

The Wounded Child is easily caught up with the victim, getting stuck in the story of suffering, feeling hopeless, worthlessness and heaviness. Themes of rejection, failure, unworthiness and longing are all prevalent in this archetypal pattern. The wounded child can feel abandoned, misunderstood, unloved, uncared for, even by themselves. They are sensitive to the pain and emotions of others often to the point of confusing others emotions with their own.

The pain from this childhood wound will replay itself over and over in the adult life until the trauma or wound is tended to and healed. Only then can the inner child mature and develop the gifts that are inherent to the Wounded Child archetype. For example, if you were bullied at school or picked on by siblings, cousins or other peers you will continue to feel bullied as an adult by co-workers, friends and other peer groups. If you were abused by a parent or an adult you may feel abused by your boss at work, the IRS, the government or any other perceived authority figure. Your reactions to this perception will match the way you coped with the abuse or bullying as a child. If you were sexually abused as a child you may perceive your spouse or partner through the highly distorted lens of your own sexual abuse. You will recreate the dynamics experienced in childhood with you as the victim. If you suffered a handicap as a child and needed constant care you will recreate the dynamics of invalid and caretaker in one of your personal relationships.

 

The Shadow Wounded Child

  • always looking backward, remembering both good and bad memories and somehow transforming them all into a painful melancholy.
  • running from his or her past and feels  haunted by the heaviness of memory.
  • blames the wound or wounding on much of their adult life problems.
  • looking backwards & creates if only phrases like:  If only I wasn’t sickly I would be able to do more & contribute, If only I had been loved and cared about I might have turned out better, If only I had been treated with respect I wouldn’t be so angry all the time, If only that hadn’t never happened to me my life would be better
  • Fear of change:  if they heal their wounds their life will change. Change equals loss. Loss is unbearable. They already feel like they have lost something deep and intrinsic and therefore they are clinging to everything else.
  •  Fear of letting go:  Another of way of looking at this could be “fear of letting go.” Letting go of an old identity, letting go of your children or spouse, letting go of your anger and resentment, letting go of sadness or the victim role and letting go of how others perceive you are a few examples.
  • Feeling misunderstood:  They are easily offended and hurt and others often feel they have to “walk on egg shells” around them.   The intense need for others to understand them while simultaneously believing that others can never understand leaves them feeling emotionally raw or needy.
  • drawn to other people’s suffering and tragedies. A fascination or over-investment in someone else’ pain or heartache is an attempt to understand their own pain and heartache which is usually too overwhelming to confront.
  • feeling of brokenness sets up a pattern of shame; shame for being depressed, shame for being not good enough, weird, angry, resentful etc. This shame, unworthiness or hopelessness traps the Shadow Wounded Child

Sometimes the Shadow Wounded Child does not associate their painful story with the past but upon examination it will be obvious that their current thoughts are old stories created out of past beliefs and experiences thus making the stories (from today) feel irrefutably true.

 

 The Wounded Child is desperately seeking to understand the pain that seems to be lurking in the background or foreground of their life.

It may seem to others that the Wounded Child does not want to be healed, but the Wounded Child senses that the wounding of their life has some value, some unnameable worth that causes them to keep the wound open and raw.

I want to be loved. . .

I want to be loved. . . is the story of the wounded child. I want to be valued and important. I want to matter to someone and be seen by others as worthy. All of these are shadow aspects of the Wounded Child because the Wounded Child cannot make others love them or see their true worth. This leaves them feeling continuously needy of others love and acceptance and they seem to never get enough of it. They want to give  to others but feel that the wound prevents them from being able to give so they get stuck in a cycle of want and emotional impoverishment.

The Enlightened Wounded Child

Forgiveness:   Forgiveness or the need to forgive is a theme for the Wounded Child.

  • Forgiveness is what happens when you stop rejecting what you believe to be the cause of your suffering.
  • Forgiveness is opening up to the bad thing and allowing it in. You may be surprised to find relief in this and that it in no way diminishes the pain but actually validates it in a way that nothing else does.
  • The Enlightened Wounded Child has a tender and open heart. This makes them open to wounding but it also makes them open to forgiveness.
  • For the Enlightened Wounded Child forgiveness is a way of life. Forgiving the past, forgiving the hurt and forgiving the losses or in other words making room for the past, making room for the hurt and making room the losses means you don’t exactly let it go as much as you widen your capacity to hold it and end the resistance to it.

 Standing in the Fire

The Enlightened Wounded Child discovers that by entering the darkness of their pain and working through it, that they can stand in the fire of pain and not be burned. Their capacity to get close to others’ pain without getting caught up in it, makes them ideal healers, doctors, nurses, therapists and others in the healing arts. They are like mountain men who know a particular terrain and can be a guide for others who are passing through. But this mountain is where the Wounded Child lives and has made their peace. They have mastered the art of letting go, embracing intense emotions and being a channel for others to release their pain. Suffering, pain, sorrow, and depression are all places the Enlightened Wounded Child has been and is not afraid to revisit. Rather than avoiding it, the Enlightened Wounded Child embraces these “negative” aspects of the human experience. They learn that some wounds aren’t meant to be healed but to be understood. The darkness becomes depth and the pain is only a sharpener to maintain keenness and sensitivity. Compassion can then be developed and the Enlightened Wounded Child is deeply compassionate and caring.

The Gift of the Wound

 

Capacity to Love Others

In its shadow the Wounded Child is looking for others to love them but the Enlightened Wounded Child knows that what they really long for is giving love to others. I want to love is truer for the Wounded Child than I want to BE loved. Unconditional love is part of the Enlightened Wounded Child and therefore they are brimming with affection and compassion for others. They are usually the friend that others turn to for understanding and support. They have a strong desire to understand others deeply and are usually non-judgmental and openhearted. They have overcome their fears of rejection and know that they can handle whatever comes their way. The Enlightened Wounded Child has learned that to Give is to Get. Understanding others is the key to understanding themselves. Giving love allows the Wounded Child to feel and receive the love of others freely and unconditionally because they have learned to love who they are enough to share that love with others. The Wounded Child gains the sense of connection and belonging that they felt was denied them, when they can be who they truly are and to be authentic and real. Many a Wounded Child has felt ashamed of their wound, that it makes them less of a person when in reality it makes them more. They have more to give, more understanding and more tenderness, rather than less. The wound when properly recognized and confronted becomes a light of hope to themselves and the rest of the world.

Conclusion

When transformed from the shadow to the light the Wounded Child archetype is a powerful example of the resiliency of the human spirit. They are open, tender, vulnerable and wise. Their life experience has taught them that the pain that once dominated their life is the source of their compassion, their insight, depth and wisdom.

EXTRA BONUS –  You Can Heal Your Life  WATCH FREE for 10 more days…

EXTRA BONUS – You Can Heal Your Life WATCH FREE for 10 more days…

You Can Heal Your Life: The Movie

 ONLY 10 Days left to watch it for FREE

Hi!  I’ve already sent out my newsletter for this week, however, I’d like to share this EXTRA BONUS with you today!   You Can Heal Your Life the movie

I was sent this link by a friend yesterday who was participating in the Hay House World Summit 2015:  A 20-Day Journey to Self-Discovery, Health, Success and Transformation.   I watched it in full last night.  All I can say is it’s POWERFUL!!

If you are on a journey to self-discovery, health, success and transformation.  I strongly encourage you to watch it!

DON’T HAVE TIME? …then I believe it will make an even bigger impact for YOU!

ONLY 10 Days left to watch it for FREE

Click HERE to watch the movie NOW…

This the first-ever film on the life and work of Louise Hay, the much loved founder of Hay House publishing and best selling author — hosted by Louise herself.   This entertaining and inspirational movie gives penetrating insights into Louise’s fascinating life story and also provides clarity on how she developed her views on self-esteem, abundance, and the metaphysical causes behind physical ailments.

A number of luminaries in the fields of self-help, health, spirituality, and new thought—including Doreen Virtue, Gregg Braden, Dr. Wayne W. Dyer, Gay Hendricks, Esther and Jerry Hicks, Leon Nacson, Dr. Christiane Northrup, Dr. Candace B. Pert, Cheryl Richardson, Dr. Mona Lisa Schulz, and many others—share their personal stories about Louise’s impact on their lives. This movie offers not only an intimate look into Louise’s inspirational life story, but also a special segment devoted to helping you apply Louise’s affirmations and groundbreaking wisdom to heal your own life and overcome the challenges that you face today.

When asked what message she hoped people would take with them after seeing You Can Heal Your Life: The Movie, Louise said, “I’d like to see them discover what they can really do for themselves. People are so hungry to learn how to take control of their lives.”

Remember, ONLY 10 Days left
to watch it for FREE

Click HERE to watch the movie NOW…

I’d love to hear what you think.  Please post your thoughts below.

Much love,

Gwen

PS  I used some of the tools I learned in the movie and added some EFT Tapping to it last night and this morning.  It was amazing in taking the next step in helping to heal that wounded inner child of mine!  As an Inner Child Advocate I look forward to sharing it with you next week…

UNLOCK Your Invisible Money Blocks

UNLOCK Your Invisible Money Blocks

       Are you doing what you love yet 

         earning less than your potential? 

   UNBLOCK Your Invisible Money Blocks…

money heartA few months back I did several UNLOCK Your Invisible Money Blocks teleseminars and it was a big hit!   Now I’m bringing it back as a limited time one-on-one offer.  I invite you to check it out.

Are you a women entrepreneur who is unknowingly sabotaging yourself around money & experiencing the same ‘ol unhealthy broken record patterns over and over again?

  • Do you have a high tolerance for low pay? (“Low Pay” is relative. You can earn 6 figures and still be earning less than your potential.)
  • Are you passionate about Making A Difference yet you underestimate your value & worth and suffer with self doubt?
  • Do you feel trapped or stuck, like you have blinders on regarding your possibilities and options around money?
  • Do you work really hard & have less than you would like to show for it?
  • Do you put others needs before your own and think that doing otherwise may be considered selfish?
  • Do you experience a lot of fear when it comes to money?   (Fear of failing, fear of rejection, afraid of being judged, afraid of not being liked, afraid of being really successful, fear of the responsibility of having a lot of money or the fear of losing it all…etc…etc…?)

If you answered YES to any of the questions above, you may be living with invisible limiting beliefs around money that may no longer be serving you.

Learn to use EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) or more commonly called “tapping” (a combination of ancient Chinese medicine and modern psychology.  Like emotional acupuncture without the needles) to clear the emotional blocks that are keeping you stuck in your old money story.

Get to the heart of the matter, the core of the problem, once and for all,  and live from a new and improved, supportive money story.

  • feel more confident
  • earn your potential
  • take off your blinders and see more creative possibilities
  • work less and have more to show for it

Register NOW:

“One hour of EFT = 100 hours of talk therapy”  ~Alina Frank

3 one hour phone/ Skype sessions for ONLY $375

    VISA  —  MasterCard  —  Discovery  —  American Express

            Done from the comfort and privacy of your own home or office

Limited Space

FIRST 3 to register will get

an EXTRA SESSION for FREE!  ($125 Value)

 

TO REGISTER: Send an email with UNLOCK Your $ Blocks in the subject line, and your name, email and  phone # to tappingintoyourstrongestlife@gmail.com

I’m excited to get started helping you to UNBLOCK Your Invisible Money Blocks and earning your potential!

Hugs!
Gwen

PS: Please pass this on to your women entrepreneur friends, family members and colleagues who would benefit….

PSS   I invite you to join us for the FREE Third Thursday Teleseminar on Thursday May 21st at 10:30am Pacific / 1:30pm Eastern.

The topic:  Q & A about EFT:  What have you always wanted to know about EFT but were afraid to ask?  A safe place to ask questions.

Simply click HERE NOW to register.   I look forward to having you on the call and answering your questions!

Got Shame?  Me too!  (Good thing, otherwise we might be sociopaths!)

Got Shame? Me too! (Good thing, otherwise we might be sociopaths!)

Dear Friend:  Happy Tuesday!  I hope this note is finding you well.  Today I’d like to share some info on shame.

Shame…. Not the thing that most people want to talk about.  And if you ‘re pretty sure that shame doesn’t apply to you, keep reading: that will be cleared up in just a sec.

I’ve been reading one of Brene Browns books, Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be brene_brown_on_belonging-421290Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead and as a vulnerability and shame researcher she talks a lot about shame.

Are you still with me?  YAY!  Keep reading… it’s gonna be beneficial I promise.

Brene tells us about what shame is, how it affects us and about how to deal with it.  I would like to end with  how EFT Tapping can help us deal with it from a core level:

1)  “We all have it.  Shame is universal and one of the most primitive human emotions that we experience. The only people who don’t experience shame lack the capacity for empathy and human connection.  Here’s your choice:  Fess up to experiencing shame or admit that you’re a sociopath.”

2)  “We’re all afraid to talk about shame.”

3)  “The less we talk about shame, the more control it has over our lives.”

If you are still reading, congratulations!

She’s funny and savvy and helps us to see shame from a safer perspective.  Her words (and tapping) are really helping me with my own shame (yep!  I’ve definitely got it too!  It’s controlled a great deal of my life and that’s probably one of the reason that I grew up to be an Emotional Freedom coach!).   Since we’ve all got it, and it’s wrecking havoc with most of us,  I just wanted to share some of her wisdom with you.

First, if you haven’t heard of Brene Brown, and you’re reading my newsletters, you need to know about her.  In a nutshell Brene is a research professor at the University of Houston Graduate College of Social Work and has spent the past decade studying vulnerability, courage, worthiness, and shame.  Click the links to watch her  20 minute TED Talks  The Power of Vulnerability (2010) and Listening to Shame   (2012) and both went viral.  (Viral?  Millions of views! Somebody must be relating to what she’s saying about shame!!  SMILE)  She’s also been on Super Soul Sunday with Oprah and has workshops on Oprah’s website.

What is Shame?

Brene’s definition of shame is “the intensely painful feeling or experience of believing that we are flawed and therefore unworthy of love and belonging.”   She goes on to say, “We are psychologically, emotionally, cognitively, and spiritually hardwired for connection, love and belonging.  It’s why we are here.  Shame is the fear of disconnection — the fear that something we’ve done or failed to do, an ideal that we’ve not lived up to, or a goal that we’ve not accomplished makes us unworthy of connection.  I’m not worthy or good enough for love, belonging, or connection.  I’m unlovable. I don’t belong.”

Shame is destructive.  It corrodes the very part of us that believes we can change and do better.”

However, there IS hope….

What is the answer?  — Shame Resilience

Brene says, “the answer is shame resilience.  (NOTE: Shame resistance is not possible.)  As long as we care about connection, the fear of disconnection will always be a powerful force in our lives, and the pain caused by shame will always be real.”   Her definition of shame resilience is “the ability to practice authenticity when we experience shame, to move though the experience without sacrificing our values, and to come out of the other side of the shame experience with more courage, compassion and connection than we had going into it.”   Shame resilience is about moving from shame toempathy — the real antidote to shame.”

Now here’s where EFT Tapping comes in….

“Shame resilience requires “thinking” and that’s where shame has a huge advantage. When shame descends, we almost always are hijacked by the limbic system.  In other words, the pre-frontal cortex, where we do all of our thinking and analyzing and strategizing” (our conscious mind that controls only 5% of our perception and behavior)  “gives way to that primitive fight-or-flight part of our brain” (subconscious mind that controls 95% of our perception and behavior).   Our fight or flight mechanism is effective for survival, not for reasoning or connection.  And the pain of shame is enough to trigger that survival part of our brain that runs, hides, or comes out swinging.”

What if we could “desensitize” or take the “sting” out of the subconscious automatic survival triggers of shame that are no longer serving us? Typically those emotional “buttons” that trip our shame triggers were installed back when we were small children.  When we felt shame as a small child, we gave it a meaning and the meaning was typically that there was something wrong with us such as we aren’t smart enough, good enough, worthy, loveable or a whole host of other meanings that gave us the feeling of shame.  Those childhood meanings and emotions live with us long into our adult lives unless we are able to process them.

EFT Tapping is designed especially to do just that!  When we are emotionally triggered in some way our body goes into fight or flight,  the threat response mechanism in our brains called the amygdula is turned up and our heart pumps faster, our muscles tense, the threat hormones of cortisol and adrenaline course though our bodies and the blood in the thinking part of our brain rushes to our arms and legs to prepare us to fight back or run away leaving little resources for thinking through the shame resilience .  With EFT Tapping we are able to turn down or off the physical reaction to the trigger.  It’s a little like updating our GPS.

If you are ready to dismantle your shame triggers with EFT Tapping email me at gwen@yourstrongestlife.com to schedule your one hour  introductory phone session done from the comfort and privacy of your own home or office.  If you don’t experience some relief in the first session you can get your money back. What have  you got to lose except your shame?

Hugs!

Gwen

Shame is expensive…   Emotional Freedom is priceless!

 

PS   I invite you to join us for the FREE Third Thursday Teleseminar on Thursday May 21st at 10:30am Pacific / 1:30pm Eastern.  The topic:  Q & A about EFT:  What have you always wanted to know about EFT but were afraid to ask?

Simply click HERE NOW to register.   I look forward to having you on the call!

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

PSS  If you live in the Tacoma, WA area keep your eyes open for the upcoming Brene Brown The Daring Way weekend workshop coming to Tacoma in mid July.  Email me at gwen@yourstrongestlife.com to learn more.

 

FREEDOM clouds

Childhood Trauma — How is it Affecting Your Business?

Childhood Trauma — How is it Affecting Your Business?

Happy Cinco De Mayo

Happy Cinco De Mayo!   In celebration of our sister women entrepreneurs around the world making a difference!

Make it a wonderful day!
Hugs!

Gwen

= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =

          If you could just get out of your own emotional way,

you are your own worst enemy.

One day, about 14 years ago, sitting in my therapist’s office continuing to search desperately for answers… why did I feel so bad about myself and  how could I stop emotionally beating myself up!  Then she said something  that caught me off-guard “well, yes you are a victim of child abuse…” and went about describing the homework she was asking me to do for the following week as if this “child abuse thing” was common knowledge.Beach Balls -2

WAIT I stopped hearing her!

I instantly felt disconnected, “ME??  Child abuse?  Naaa….” Then I felt the reaction in my body. It gripped my gut and I instantly felt fear, the need to back pedal everything I’d told her up to this point. I felt like I HAD to protect my mom. She was my mom after all!  That terrified little child inside felt that if I didn’t protect my mom, I would get in big trouble and get hit with the wooden paddle again.

The more it sank in… child abuse??…. really?… Is that really what that was? All this time I thought there was something wrong with ME, “I” had been doing something wrong. “I” wasn’t good enough. “I” was the bad little girl. That’s what my mom always implied. I thought she had been right about all those things she had growled at me for when she was angry, and hitting me with the wooden paddle, the shaming comments “you’re just crying to get attention” or the angry wagging finger in my face “you SHOULD be ashamed of yourself!”

Child abuse? This couldn’t be child abuse, could it? It wasn’t THAT bad. I wasn’t getting hit… well, sometimes. It wasn’t sexual… well, then there was THAT time… It WAS pretty emotional!  The doubts and confusions were swirling in my head like the scary things flying past the window in the storm scene of the Wizard of Oz… even though I knew somewhere deep inside she was right.

Childhood Trauma –What is it Really?

According to Dr. Robert Scaer MD, trauma specialist, a trauma can be anytime we’ve felt helpless, powerless or overwhelmed or when our safety or the safety of someone we loved was threatened.

The following are some common events that may cause childhood traumas:

• Parents divorcing when you’re young
• Financial struggles in the family
• Serious illness or death of a parent, grandparent or sibling
• Being adopted
• Being born with a birth trauma or defect
• Having problems at school
• Abandonment issues
• Sexual, physical or emotional abuse (even mild)
• Sibling issues (birth order, rivalry, teasing or competition)
• Living with alcoholic, drug addicted or depressed parents
• Growing up with emotionally distant or absent parents
• Living with parents or caregivers who were critical, controlling or demanding

From the perspective of a small child these events and experiences can be terrifying, traumatizing and life altering.

I call them emotional beach balls.

When we are busy trying to subconsciously “stuff” and hold down all those old painful memories and emotions from childhood such as fear, shame, guilt, sadness, feeling unworthy and unloved, etc. it’s like trying to hold a beach ball under the water.  It keeps trying to pop back up again.  The more emotional beach balls we are trying to hold down, the more they drain our energy.

Then we grow up and decide to start a business… we want to help others, while we desperately keep trying to hold down our own invisible beach balls.  Many of us as women entrepreneurs who are passionate about making a difference in the world have experienced some type of trauma or wound in our own lives (often in childhood) or have witnessed something ugly in the world, not necessarily to us but to other people that we cared about, and it made us want to do something about it. Many of us have read every self help book and spent hundreds of hours and thousands of dollars in talk therapy only to be disappointed and continue to struggle and feel stuck.

As successful entrepreneur Ali Brown says, “There’s no better personal development tool than starting your own business.”  Starting your own business is often a perfect environment to bring up all of those personal beach balls to deal with or as I like to say, gives us an “opportunity” to heal those childhood trauma’s.

The Good News:

• What if we could let the air out of those beach balls safely, relatively quickly and often permanently?

• What if we didn’t have to go back and slosh through all the gory details re-traumatizing ourselves all over again?

• What if we could take the physical “sting” out of the memories and experience them from a different, more manageable perspective?

• What if we could begin to live our lives through the lens of strength, confidence and empowerment vs helplessness and overwhelm?

• How might that change our day-to-day lives, in our relationships and our businesses, now and in the future?

Now with the help of EFT Tapping I am able to help you to let go of the leftover childhood fears, traumas and debilitating limiting beliefs that are keeping you stuck today.

As an Advanced Level EFT Practitioner and Inner Child Advocate, I am extremely passionate about helping other women entrepreneurs like yourself advocate on behalf of that scared little child inside who has been running YOUR business and dealing with YOUR finances. 

Let’s help HER to clear the inner emotional blocks and obstacles that are keeping HER stuck such as:

  • fear of failure,
  • fear of rejection,
  • fear of putting herself out there,
  • fear of looking foolish or
  • being less than perfect
  • and even fear of success

…allowing YOU to make THE difference YOU are here to make and live Your Strongest Life.

The world needs you!

Are YOU really ready to get out of your own emotional way?  I invite you to email me at gwen@yourstrongestlife.com to schedule your complimentary 30 minute chat.  Your inner child will thank you. She doesn’t have to do this all alone anymore!

Hugs!

Gwen

PS  I’d love to hear your thoughts below… let’s get a conversation going.  My experience with Emotional Freedom coaching is that we are more alike than different and that MOST of us have had some childhood trauma’s that are holding us back as women entrepreneurs today, even if many of them are invisible and stored in our subconscious. (The number one question I get asked when women are considering if YSL is a good match for them or not is, “What if I don’t know what to tap on?”  Exactly!  Most people don’t.  That’s the beauty of EFT, you don’t have to!  As we calm you body down, and it feels safe, it does all the work for you!  As your tour guide, I just ask the right questions!)

We just think we are the only ones that feel messed up, and that everyone else has their act together.  Well, I assure you, that is not true!  I KNOW I’m a work in progress and it’s wonderful to have a tool like EFT on our side!

PSS   I invite you to join us for the FREE Third Thursday Teleseminar on Thursday May 21st at 10:30am Pacific / 1:30pm Eastern.  The topic:  Q & A about EFT:  What have you always wanted to know about EFT but were afraid to ask?

Simply click HERE NOW to register.   I look forward to having you on the call!